Friday (Tomorrow) is her last day of radiation! HURRAY! We're baking her a cake and hanging a "Congratulations" banner in front of the house! She is trying to "downplay" it, but it IS a huge deal! She gets to ring a bell in celebration right there in the hospital... that's cool. I'm going to try to get a picture of it. :)
Mom's well into the count down. I don't know how many days left - I think only 6.
Anyway, as of Thursday, they changed the direction of the radiation rays. This time they go right into her surgical site where the cancer was. She says it doesn't hurt when they do it, but about 2-4 hours later it feels like someone is ripping her insides out. She told them and they were pleased because that's "how it's supposed to feel". Oh great, then YOU do it.
Anyway, we're really going to have something to be thankful for this year at Thanksgiving time. She's still got to do the herceptin shots once every three weeks, and then be wary for 4 more years after that, but it's changed us - in a good way. We appreciate each other more every day. The acute stress of her going through all this has subsided somewhat, but I still wish she didn't have to deal with it at all. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad she found it and caught it early, but why did she have to get it at all? Questions to ask God I guess.
She's only got 12 radiation sessions left. She's tired of it. I'm tired of it.
She said she used to be angry, but now she's just tired of going to the hospital every day.
I've been going with her most days and I'm tired too.
I tried to put myself in her position. I mean, really put myself in her shoes. It's one thing to go there every day and be able to wander about and do what I want to do, but if I had to have some procedure or undress everyday, I think I'd be very angry.
Anyway, she is almost finished and we should have a huge party!
She'll still have the shots to do once every three weeks, but she'll not have to go to the hospital every single stinking day!
Mom's almost to the half way mark for radiation. She's so tired of it. Also, the marker they use and the cream she uses stains her shirts. Yuck.
Anyway, I went with her yesterday and got to see the huge machine. I didn't take a picture of the machine (darn it) but I did of the entrance and thick door. Those guys in there look so young! I mean, ew, she's got to bare her breasts and they get to draw on it and then zap it. Oh the joy. I don't know that I'd be comfortable with a girl either, but still...
So, we're looking forward to the day this is all over and all she has is the fading memories.
So when mom went to the support group, apparently she met a woman there who had the same thing and is going through the same treatment at the same stage right now. I met her last night and, for some reason, it felt "good" to see someone else in the same condition as mom. I mean, I guess it's not good that either person had it, but it was good to see that mom is "normal". It kind of seems, at times, like she's the only one going through it. After all, that's all *I* see anyway. But when I saw this lady she was wearing a wig, looked tired, but still had a smile on her face and talked about regular things. I know, this all sounds so silly... I'm just glad mom doesn't look worse than that lady. They look good for what they've had to deal with. Finally, mom can talk to someone about things. Hopefully anyway.
Mom and her hubby went to a support group last night. They wore shirts that the hospital gave them. Mom's said, "Survivor" and his said, "Caretaker". Pretty cool that they wore them. Anyway, when she left, she was kind of nervous, however, when she came back, she was better. I think only because it was over. When I asked her what it was like, she said that all that they had time for was everyone to go around the room and introduce themselves and tell what kind of cancer they had. So, she really didn't get much out of it as far as she can tell. I'm glad she went anyway though.
Mom got her first herceptin (or however you spell it) injection today. Now she feels like crap. AND the doctor only gave her 1/3 the dose of normal. This is going to be a LONG year... It's also made her feel pretty down. She's not admitting it, but she's not her usual self today.
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